After an overnight flight to meet my father at his latest military assignment, my mother wearily arrived at Rhein-Main Air Base in Germany with my eight siblings and me -- all under age 11. Collecting our many suitcases, the ten of us entered the cramped customs area. A young customs official watched our entourage in disbelief, 'Ma'am,' he said, 'do all these children and this luggage belong to you?'
'Yes, sir,' my mother said with a sigh, 'they're all mine.'
The customs agent began his interrogation: 'Ma'am, do you have any weapons, contraband or illegal drugs in your possession?'
'Sir,' she calmly answered, 'if I'd had any of those items, I would have used them by now.'